A few things you should know about me...

1. I'm Asian... but I don't speak Korean, Japanese, Chinese, Mandarin, or any other Asian dialect.

2. I was first introduced to Van Gogh in 2nd grade in Mrs. Riske's class... then and there I drew my first replica and I've been hooked ever since.

3. If I could, I would eat jalapenos on anything and everything.

4. I sing and dance in front of the mirror.

5. I love the Lord of the Rings trilogy... my roommates used to make fun of me and called me a dork... I stopped proclaiming my love after that because college kids need to be cool... but I'm an adult now and I don't care if people judge me.

6. If I could be a starving artist in Europe... I so would, but I have the next 10 years to pay back my student loans.

7. I had head gear when I was younger... and I had to wear it to school. That was enough to make a girl insecure for the rest of her life... but I was too naive to notice the jokes being told about me.

8. I worked my butt off for 4 years to graduate in the top 10% of my sr. class... and I walked away from UT to go to OBU. Yeah... I still haven't quite figured out what I was on when I made that decision.

9. My most embarrassing moment involves a song by the Plain White T's.

10. My dog Buddy is the love of my life. I'm afraid I will have to go to counseling after he dies.

11. I'm terrified of fish. I can look at them, but for me to get in the water with them would give me an anxiety attack.

12. I hate feet and I do not like touching them. I've never had a pedicure, nor will I ever get one.

13. Tanning beds scare me because I'm somewhat claustrophobic, so I will never even try.

14. My drivers license says I'm 5'1... I'm only 5 ft. tall, but the lady at the DPS felt sorry for me so she gave me an inch... she told me this.

15. When I went to Instanbul, I was proposed to. Maybe I should have accepted his offer?

Mother knows best...

So in honor of Mother's Day yesterday, I feel like I should pay homage and blog about moms. I am definitely not a mother, nor do I want to become one anytime soon... being responsible for myself is enough of a burden as is. But yes, one day, maybe 10 years down the road, I hope that God allows me to be a mother. At Passion sophomore year, I admitted that was my biggest fear... God telling me I could never be a mom. Lame fear right? I beg to differ... there is nothing like a mother's love for a child. It goes beyond deep and unconditional, it's a beautiful bond. I want to experience that. 

Well, my mom and I haven't been on common ground about my adultness. I'm at an age where I want to be independent and do my own thang... but it's hard sometimes when you're still trying to find your footing. My mom will always see me as her baby... this is the one problem about being the youngest out of 4... now matter how old I get, I will always be baby Kimmy. I want to fight her on this. We argue, we cry, we both want to be right... so where do you draw the line? Who wins and who loses? 

I could easily look my mom in the eye and say, "I'm an adult and there's nothing you can do about that! I don't care what you think, I'm going to do whatever I want. Stop trying to interfere!" Well... to an extent that is right, but in all honesty, that's not a very adult comment. It sounds more like a selfish teenager comment I made back in the day.  So yeah... I don't need to channel my inner 16 year old... that was just a bad time all around for me. 

Sometimes you have to prove to your parents, especially to an overprotective mother, that you are in fact an adult. And this is done not by arguing or manipulation, but by understanding where your mother is coming from and then helping her understand where you're coming from. There is a reason why moms know best... because usually they do. They have a valid point, so let them make it, and then be open to it. And sometimes you have to make your own mistakes to learn and grow, but least hear her out. When you give respect, you get respect in return. No one wants to have an adult conversation with someone who won't listen and automatically gets defensive. And then there comes a day when your mom doesn't even have to tell you what's right, she has enough confidence in you and can see your heart... this is when she knows she raised you right and prepared you for a life full of challenges. All I can say is I learned a whole lot this year!!!! It's almost ridiculous! Even in the past 72 hours... I think I've really wised up and matured. I just needed a forceful push!

I may not have my mother's DNA... I will never look like her on the outside, but I would love for my heart to look like hers. My mother is the most selfless woman I know. She has sacrificed so much for my family... and especially for me. She never had to love me. I was not hers by birth. She chose to love me. So as an adult, I'm starting to understand my mom on a deeper level. We may not always agree and we may butt heads, but I can appreciate her love and her care. Some people don't have moms that worry and want to protect their kids. I will make my mistakes, and she will have to let me make them. But I will let her give advice and I will listen with and open ear and open heart. Again, I originally had a mom who didn't want me, so how dare I ever take for granted the great love of my true mom who never once was obligated to love me. I will never outgrow my mom's love and I will never outgrow needing her there to comfort me when I feel like my world is falling apart. Nothing is better than hearing a parent tell you how much you're worth and how great of a plan God has for your life. So thank you to my mom for raising me right... and thank you to all the other wonderful women who have played a role in teaching me what it means to be a strong, beautiful woman! I'm a work in progress, but I will get there.